Happy Birthday Joel!

For Joel's birthday, all he wanted was this cake:

If you'll please note, it is a person happily jogging along, happily jogging along, and then puking.

RJ was over the other day when Responsible Jane called asking for some Rock n' Roll Marathon themed puns to put on a cake. RJ was coming up with some real knee-slappers like "If you run in front of a car, you may get tired" or "If you run behind a car, you may get exhausted". Seriously the guy never ends. Jihee and I wondered last night whether he might not be a secret member of that esteemed organization MENSA. He is not. Well this cake was inspired by Joel's favorite idea from the punning session. Travis might not have survived the horror.

Happy Birthday Joel!

love, rosanna

Is there a rule?

Is there a rule that at the moment you most need to stop, your brake cable will break? (That's phonetically ironic.)

Is there a rule that when you start making enough money to buy moped parts you won't have enough time to work on mopeds?

Is there a rule that youth will always fade, pride comes before the fall, and pretty bikes will one day be scorned as "ratty bikes"?

Is there a rule that a deluge of carburetors will surely bring a dearth of intakes?

What's the deal with that?

Ahhhh... my old friend, unemployment.

Well, the streak couldn't last forever, and with the closing night of the Seattle International Film Festival, so too my employment came to an end.
Twas the magic hour yesterday, and a couple of handsome fellows joined me at my home for a round of "watch Joel fix his bike".

I have to say, despite the constant abuse that I endure, it sure is nice to have friends around rather than working hermit like in my darkened shed. I think that RJ was a little sad that he didn't get to use his hacksaw, but Travis and Phil's presence really kept me entertained and they helped me determine that I had a pretty massive air leak. So after buttoning everything up and putting in a new gasket, we were ready to roll. I dutifully passed on my mom's wisdom regarding Golden Gardens, "It was a homosexual bathhouse in the 70's", but RJ and Travis could not be deterred. We met some real nice sport bike riders who as Travis put it, "obviously thought we were lame and we obviously thought that they were lame, but everyone was very polite about it."

As rosanna has mentioned there have been some improvements to our fleet recently, rosanna's stabilizator finally kicked the bucket:
So after replacing that guy, she is now the proud rider of properly stabilized forks. Phil claims that he has never broken one of those and I'm about to replace a third so I can only deduce that his riding style has been less balls to the wall than my own.

I seized my stock crank(?), the cheeks froze up on the con rod... I have no idea how or why this happened.
Since it happened mid-festival for me, I had to get that bike back on the road fast. So, in the course of a day, I took apart the 'ol polini engine and slapped a new Treats 70cc reed kit on it.

Notice the JB Weld that is sealing and securing the pulse valve nipple on the intake.

I have to say that the performance is really awesome for how cheap the kit is, and I think that though I may make a few minor changes, this will probably be my torquey daily rider.

More changes to come soon, since I now have nothing but time on my hands.

Public Aesthetics

I have been informed that Travis Knarpsworth hates my blog header.

Apparently...
-my hair is gross because I hadn't washed myself in 5 days
-I'm all bleary eyed from sleeping on a bus
-the huge beef jerky slab is gross
-Travis hates Matt Smith and his red eyes

stay tuned for a more pleasing header soon. I'm thinking something like this:


or



is an affliction themed moped in the works? only time will tell!

Jankiness all around.

By Rosanna


Apparently, I am no judge of when a bike has reached the 'too-janky-to-be-ridden' point. I'm like a frog in a pot of slowly boiling water. After Joel's moped had a near apocalyptic fail on Tuesday (making me near apoplectic*) and we had been rescued by the gallant Scooby/Snordes/Knight in Shining White Van, Joel used my moped for a quick errand run. He returned a little, uh, perturbed, saying 'I CAN'T believe you ride that thing every day. It is a rattling death trap'.

*Joel HARD SEIZED A STOCK BIKE (really, the crank locked up) and it didn't really make me apoplectic, I just couldn't resist the verbal play. I have no self-control.

So both wheels need to be tightened, so my stabilizator (fork brace to those not in the know) broke last week and I haven't managed to replace it yet. So my shocks are completely worn out (because it used to belong to a certain somebody who jumped it off every curb in sight). So I have begun to avoid certain roads like the plague they are (the road by gas works is especially scary). Eh, what are you going to do?

I've been saying for weeks, if not months, that it felt like my wheels were a bit wobbly. But does anyone listen? One day, Joel comes home from moped monday and informs me that Michael Mike is of the opinion that my wheels are wobbly and they need to be tightened. O good, I'm glad we got that figured out. But, mopeds around here always seem like fires that need to be put out. Let's just say my wheels have not been a priority.

Also, after re-jetting post-LA rally, my low-end has suffered tremendously. Tuesday night, a new stabilizator was put on the red and gold (I was a stickler and made sure it was painted black before being put on the bike) and then as we were running out the door wednesday morning, Joel raised the needle clip in my carburetor. It felt like I was riding a new bike! It was so stable. It was quite zippy. We even went along Northlake Way (the road by gas works) and it wasn't nearly as heart-attack inducing as it has been recently. Woot! for minor changes that actually make a difference.

In other fun news: the mermaid bike is making surprisingly fast progress. I was resigned to patiently waiting for the parts as funding allowed, but everything is flowing along quite smoothly. I got a 70cc treats kit, basically the alukit with a flat exhaust port. On monday, I port-matched my engine to the kit. All by myself. It was exciting.

Basically I need to get a few misc. parts here and there (shocks, throttle assembly blah blah). I'm working on patterns for my exhaust pipe today. All in all, progress is being made folks.

Well, Joel just announced that we're having a wheel and brake clinic right now, so off I go.

Living the plush life, oh yeah!

It's been lean times here at Kastle Kvernmo. Despite what you may have heard, unemployment is not the key to wealth and fast mopeds. But times are changing my friends! I have been employed for a whole two months! WHOOOOOO! Call the Ferrari dealership, I'm putting my down payment on my new car!

Hmmmm.... not really. But I did have enough money to purchase some new parts.
Rosanna can hardly contain her glee:



In related news, my friend Brett Walker moved to San Francisco recently. I wish him well and hope he has great success. The bright side of his egress from Ballard, WA is the moped parts I was able to snag from him while he was vulnerable and worried about transporting it all. The resulting plunder I acquired made it possible for me to cobble together another running bike.



Some of you may recognize the forks and rear struts. This is v.3 of "the orange and ______ bike" and I feel that this is the best iteration yet. The Pinto is going to be getting a major overhaul both cosmetically as well as structurally, so you can eagerly look forward to update on that I'm sure. In the meantime, the pinto motor has to think about what it did wrong.


This Orange and Black bike will be getting an Athena 70cc kit put on it as soon as I can get an intake fashioned for it along with some weird 20mm(?) Mikuni knockoff carb that takes Dellorto jets.

That's all for now, more moped improvements on the way!